I want someone to come to my funeral dressed as a clown. She should stand quietly until the officiant asks for people to come up to share memories of the deceased. Then the clown will walk silently to the microphone, honk her horn once, pull a comically over-sized handkerchief out of her sleeve, dab her eye, and slip back into the crowd.

“Let’s put the ‘sin’ back in ‘sinn und bedeutung.'”
“I’d like to make like G.E. Moore and use my two hands to prove to you that the external world exists.”
“How do you feel about the use/mention distinction? Because if you mention it, I’ll use it.”
“I’d like to modus your ponens.”
“I’m a mereologist. I’d like to discuss the relation between your part and my hole.”
“I’m a *very* hard determinist.”