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Archive for November, 2011

Plumbous Dirigible’s “Escalator to Paradise”

Saturday, November 12th, 2011

Parody Zep Image

There’s a woman who’s convinced
Shiny objects are exclusively golden
And she’s purchasing an escalator to paradise!
Upon arrival she rests assured
that if the retail establishments are all shuttered
by fiat, she can obtain her desires.
Oooh, oooh, and she’s purchasing an escalator to paradise!

Indications are presented by signage, but she seeks confirmation
because utterances often are ambiguous.
Arboreally sheltered by a river, a musical avian warbles:
“On occasion, the totality of our cognition is in error!”

Ooh, it makes me ponderous. Yes, I contemplate these things.
And she’s purchasing an escalator to paradise!

I have emotions upon gazing occidentally
and my immaterial substance weeps for exit.
Mentally, I have observed circles of pollutant in the interstices of the forest
and the speech acts of stationary observers.

Ooh, it makes me ponderous. Yes, I contemplate these things.
And she’s purchasing an escalator to paradise!

At low volume it is conveyed that shortly, if power is shared universally
A flautist will direct us towards rationality.
Hence, a novel diurnal phase commences for those who have been vertical for extended periods
Following which the woodland areas will produce the resounding of guffaws.

In the event that your shrubbery is host to a to-do, maintain calm!
This is nothing but a seasonal washing for the vernal regent.
The road splits dyadically, but over the course of time
you may select an alternate route.
This makes me ponderous.

Cerebrally, you experience a low tone, I tell you in case you were not informed,
the flautist seeks your accompaniment.
Madame, are you deaf to the sounds of breezes, also, are you informed
that your escalator rests upon softly speaking zephyrs?

Simultaneous with our perambulations
our penumbras are at greater height than our psyches.
Hither ambles a woman of our mutual acquaintance
emitting full-spectrum visual radiation, seeking to demonstrate
the way in which all objects can be transmuted to precious metal.
Were you to attend assiduously
the melody would be made present to you, finally.
At such a time when difference is negated,
there exists an unmoving mineral.

And she’s purchasing an escalator to paradise.

Actual episode titles from “Leave it to Beaver”:

Friday, November 4th, 2011

June Cleaver

Captain Jack
Beaver’s Short Pants
Lonesome Beaver
Cleaning Up Beaver
Tenting Tonight
The Shave
The Pipe
Happy Weekend
Beaver Takes A Bath
Beaver’s Freckles
Beaver’s Secret Life
Beaver’s First Date
Beaver’s Long Night
Three Boys and a Burro

(From the complete episode list on the Internet Movie Database)